Post by Gawayn on Jan 31, 2010 9:27:32 GMT -5
This is posted on DC's War Stories Board, but I had so much fun doing this, I had to post it closer to home. I have made some corrections and improvements from the original post. I tried to include every NPC from the game, mouthing one of their signature lines, if I could swing it.
This poem's meter is dodecasyllabic. Otherwise known as the Alexandrine line.
Teneo Te Tangi
I wander the castle, all worn and all weary
My feet are like iron, my opals all peer-y
I go hacking and slashing, flay all the day long
I take no names or send cards, compose not a song
So I walk down the road, visit friends far and near
To call on their aid, have them help conquer my fear
"You look tired," says Shamus, of Silvertouch Storage
As poor Silas Keeper cries into his porridge
"Ahoy Laddeo," Briny says at his Diner
"Don't look so mopey or I'll think you're a whiner!"
"Need some shirtzez?" says Smidgeon Crumb of Gobble Inn
I can't bear to tell him of the state I am in
"Orcs are greedy," the Forest Guild Magus doth sneer
A snot could consume him, I would shed not a tear
"Arr," comes sad groans from Slick Willy's Gambling Den
"Well, piss on me," says Short Smithy, "you need some Zen."
Servile Krymp bows to me, whines "what are your wishes?"
Bill wants me to have Servile sleep with the fishes
"Hiya," says Aileen, wanting the Smith to marry
I can't bear to tell her Sally thinks she is scary!
And when Elden Bishop cannot help cure my loss
A note tells me to seek Alexander Dumas
"I am old but not blind and I know where to start."
"Go speak to the Queen," he shouts, "and follow your heart!"
I walk to the throne room with some trepidation
I tremble enough to try some levitation
"Tell me a story," the Queen says, looking to me
I tell her of a time when my heart remained free
Of a love I had long lost, fled through my mistake
Never knowing that moment would see my heart break
So I search through the kingdom, I spend all the day
My search had no pattern, I tried finding my way
I knew not if she'd take me back, where she hast gone
Is my love for her like an expired coupon?
"Forsooth, halt!" saith the Queen, "lest I grow very ill!"
"No more of your story, pray, it gives me a chill."
"But all is not lost, sir knight, I know my lands still"
Then Queen Beth smiled and said "Look for her on the hill!"
So on through the forest and up a high mountain
I stopped for a quiet meal next to a fountain
"What's wrong?" Gathrank Cunning asks. "You look a bit sad."
"Looking for her, good chum? So she'll make you feel glad?"
I paused and considered, what would I have to pay?
Never with such eloquence had I heard him say
More than grunts before now, he was trying his best
To find me my way, of all good creatures most blest!
So he pointed me a path, where I had to go
With Troll Wart perfume, my thanks to him did I show
So up through the mountains, into high snowy mists
I recalled heretofore where there'd been many trysts
Up into the high reaches, on top of the clouds
Till I found the Magic Shop, my hope it enshrouds
"Greetings Master," she did beam. "How may I serve thee?"
"Djinni!" I cried. "I failed you, you must pity me!"
"Seek and Ye shall find," she said, "You were told thus so."
"Say not how long or hard you looked, trust that I know."
"Speak not of time, you know never ask a girl's age."
"Do not anger me," she warned, "knows the wisest sage."
She saw I was repentant, the tears on my face
She looked into my heart and gazed on me with grace
"Seltzer cleans dust," she winked, "when your way becomes lost."
"Seltzer of forgiveness, when you realize the cost."
I rose to my feet then, my heart skipping and free
As my Djinni, my love, wrapped her arms around me
With the help of my friends, my quest came to an end
With their knowledge and wisdom and an ear to bend
They gave me counsel and solace, many a beer
Grumbling to themselves I was a pain in their rear
But I gained their respect, with my heroic quest
To seek forgiveness and reach her, I showed my best
And finding what was lost, holding her with my hand
So my love could whisper "Your wish is my command."
This poem's meter is dodecasyllabic. Otherwise known as the Alexandrine line.
Teneo Te Tangi
I wander the castle, all worn and all weary
My feet are like iron, my opals all peer-y
I go hacking and slashing, flay all the day long
I take no names or send cards, compose not a song
So I walk down the road, visit friends far and near
To call on their aid, have them help conquer my fear
"You look tired," says Shamus, of Silvertouch Storage
As poor Silas Keeper cries into his porridge
"Ahoy Laddeo," Briny says at his Diner
"Don't look so mopey or I'll think you're a whiner!"
"Need some shirtzez?" says Smidgeon Crumb of Gobble Inn
I can't bear to tell him of the state I am in
"Orcs are greedy," the Forest Guild Magus doth sneer
A snot could consume him, I would shed not a tear
"Arr," comes sad groans from Slick Willy's Gambling Den
"Well, piss on me," says Short Smithy, "you need some Zen."
Servile Krymp bows to me, whines "what are your wishes?"
Bill wants me to have Servile sleep with the fishes
"Hiya," says Aileen, wanting the Smith to marry
I can't bear to tell her Sally thinks she is scary!
And when Elden Bishop cannot help cure my loss
A note tells me to seek Alexander Dumas
"I am old but not blind and I know where to start."
"Go speak to the Queen," he shouts, "and follow your heart!"
I walk to the throne room with some trepidation
I tremble enough to try some levitation
"Tell me a story," the Queen says, looking to me
I tell her of a time when my heart remained free
Of a love I had long lost, fled through my mistake
Never knowing that moment would see my heart break
So I search through the kingdom, I spend all the day
My search had no pattern, I tried finding my way
I knew not if she'd take me back, where she hast gone
Is my love for her like an expired coupon?
"Forsooth, halt!" saith the Queen, "lest I grow very ill!"
"No more of your story, pray, it gives me a chill."
"But all is not lost, sir knight, I know my lands still"
Then Queen Beth smiled and said "Look for her on the hill!"
So on through the forest and up a high mountain
I stopped for a quiet meal next to a fountain
"What's wrong?" Gathrank Cunning asks. "You look a bit sad."
"Looking for her, good chum? So she'll make you feel glad?"
I paused and considered, what would I have to pay?
Never with such eloquence had I heard him say
More than grunts before now, he was trying his best
To find me my way, of all good creatures most blest!
So he pointed me a path, where I had to go
With Troll Wart perfume, my thanks to him did I show
So up through the mountains, into high snowy mists
I recalled heretofore where there'd been many trysts
Up into the high reaches, on top of the clouds
Till I found the Magic Shop, my hope it enshrouds
"Greetings Master," she did beam. "How may I serve thee?"
"Djinni!" I cried. "I failed you, you must pity me!"
"Seek and Ye shall find," she said, "You were told thus so."
"Say not how long or hard you looked, trust that I know."
"Speak not of time, you know never ask a girl's age."
"Do not anger me," she warned, "knows the wisest sage."
She saw I was repentant, the tears on my face
She looked into my heart and gazed on me with grace
"Seltzer cleans dust," she winked, "when your way becomes lost."
"Seltzer of forgiveness, when you realize the cost."
I rose to my feet then, my heart skipping and free
As my Djinni, my love, wrapped her arms around me
With the help of my friends, my quest came to an end
With their knowledge and wisdom and an ear to bend
They gave me counsel and solace, many a beer
Grumbling to themselves I was a pain in their rear
But I gained their respect, with my heroic quest
To seek forgiveness and reach her, I showed my best
And finding what was lost, holding her with my hand
So my love could whisper "Your wish is my command."